Very early tomorrow morning, Darlene and I will get up and drive to Branson, Missouri. It's my absolute least favorite place in America: a shallow, artificial, entertainment-oriented culture that pretends to be rural but grinds to a halt every day with traffic jams that stretch for ten miles and manage to make big-city traffic seem like a drive in the country by comparison.
Branson is the place where Jim Bakker went to start a new "ministry" after his release from prison. If he had come to any real American town and announced he was starting a TV ministry, he would have been tarred and feathered and ridden out on a rail. But I understand he has been quite successful in Branson. Show-biz style religion is very, very popular there. Not as popular as bad country music, perhaps, but still very popular.
Did I mention that I really hate the place?
Darlene's parents live there, however, and I really do love my in-laws. So almost every time we come to Tulsa, we make the long, tedious drive to Branson. Tomorrow we will make that annual pilgrimage.
Darlene will drive, and I'll plug my new laptop into the cigarette lighter and try to finish editing a chapter John MacArthur is contributing to one of those symposium books currently being assembled by our friends at Ligonier Ministries. I hope I can get it done, because tomorrow is the deadline. (Burk Parsons, if you see this; I haven't forgotten.)
Then Thursday we'll return from Branson via Siloam Springs, where we'll have lunch with the inimitable Frank Turk—he of "Centuri0n" fame.
So I have no time or energy to post anything of substance tonight. But as long as I'm here, and seeing that my past two posts have both been accompanied by comic-book art, why not continue the week's theme?
I've always loved the look of comic-book cover art. Just the image of a comic-book cover evokes vivid memories from my childhood of the unique smell of freshly-printed comic-book paper. Today's comic books don't ever smell that good. What's up with that?Anyway, this cover is in honor of my new sidekick, Pecadillo, whose blog has managed to upset more homeschool moms in a single week than I did in my first three months.
My sincerest apologies to all whom he has managed to offend. Let me just say that he takes after his mother.
20 comments:
Dear Phil:
One of my favorite comic book covers can be found here.
On thing I often tell my home schooled children when others offend us is: "Maybe one day you will be a lab technician or a doctor or a nurse, and you may have to insert an I.V. into that person who offended your mother when she was a home school mom. Maybe you won't be very proficient at finding a vein."
Not a Christian attitude, I know. What can I say? I'm depraved.
Once, when another child offended my home schooled son, he replied with: "Well, when you're pumping gas, I'll be collecting my PdD." We had a talk about grace and kindness after that.
Phil,
What edition is this Pyromaniac Comics? I don't see the month.
Phil, don’t forge to take a picture with Frank. We are all dying to see if there will be one halo or two :-)
Phil said: "Branson, Missouri. It's my absolute least favorite place in America: a shallow, artificial, entertainment-oriented culture that pretends to be rural but grinds to a halt every day with traffic jams that stretch for ten miles and manage to make big-city traffic seem like a drive in the country by comparison.
Phil? What does that make LA? By the way, my wife says visit the Dixie Stampede. It has the best food in Branson!
Phil,
Since you're in Tulsa, go to Oral Roberts University and take a picture of the big statue of the praying hands. That's a great word and faith campus,(sarcasm) and then there is also Rhema Bible Institute in Broken Arrow, you can go visit that campus and talk to Kenneth Hagin, Jr. (more sarcasm)
Plus you have a few Mardel's Christian book stores, that is an excellent bookstore to find alot of Christian theological and doctrinal and puritan books.
"Thanks for bringing it up"
Uhm, I'm pretty sure you brought it up. So I don't want to hear/see it! :)
Phil said: "Branson, Missouri. It's my absolute least favorite place in America: a shallow, artificial, entertainment-oriented culture that pretends to be rural but grinds to a halt every day with traffic jams that stretch for ten miles and manage to make big-city traffic seem like a drive in the country by comparison.
Sounds like Gatlinburg and Pigeon Forge. Long live Dollwywood!
JR
How dare you pick on Branson! I drive through that town (as fast as I legally can) once a year to get to my inlaws in NW Arkansas. I think they ought to move Pedro (South of the Border) from the east coast to Branson. BTW, my wife and I spent a few days of our honeymoon in Siloam Springs.
And does Jim Bakker look old or what? Maybe he can get Oral Robert to pray him a little hair!
apelles:
I think Burttd probably has some cause to think that Phil was poking fun at BHT. Across the top of the comic is the caption "Pyromanic and Pecadillo roll over the Tavern-Monkeys".
I'm not interesting in taking sides on this, but just pointing out that Burttd had some reason to think there was a joke going on at BHT expense.
Phil.... stir up some more controversy while you are on vacation why don't you. As for the comic - I think the guys at BHT are a little too sensitive about it. Sure it was an old WWII cover with some pretty stereotypical caricatures of the Japanese... but if you notice in the background the flags that are being waved are the US flag, and the Canadian flag... so maybe Canadian's are the ones to be offended.
If the fellows over at Boar's Head are actually Japanese, I might be able to understand their sensibilities on this...but since most of them probably are not, all I have to say is, "my blog can beat up your blog!"
I guess Phil forgot how easily the Tavern patrons can be reduced to tears when they see that kind of blatant political incorrectness. They have such fragile psyches and such altruistic hearts!
But I'm sure Phil will want to crawl across shards of broken glass do penance when he reads your complaint, Doug. You've expressed yourself with such dispassionate logic and clear common sense.
Anyone who has ever visited the Boar's head ought to have understood that y'all always demand the most careful propriety and proper etiquette. How utterly insensitive of Phil! I'm ashamed to say he was ever my friend.
I almost repented for calling the guys at the BHT ladies until today. However, that is a pretty morbid comic image. I like it.
Doug:
"If anyone wants to insult us verbally, knock yourself out. *That* we can take."
That line cracked me up. You had me going there for a minute, but when you said that, I KNEW you couldn't be serious.
Good one.
Am I the only one that finds it amazing that a person who is so clearly void of a sense of humor still reads Phil’s blog?
I was in Branson over the past 4th of July, and found it exactly as you describe it. I also found free WiFi in the lobby of the Radison Inn.
Douglas came over here on his own. No one at the BHT had said a word about this comic. Douglas was offended. Douglas commented. Not me. Not 30+ other contributors at a group blog, most of whom have no idea this discussion is going on or spent one keystroke commenting on it. But over here, it's a BHT group assault, group whine, group gripe, yada yada yada.
Doug writes:
As far as the name-calling goes, it's pretty even. He calls us "Tavern Monkeys", we call him "Burninator"
(Fred) But "Tavern Monkeys" is way more funny than "burninator." That put down is just lame. I would imagine Phil even thinks it is funny. When coming up with a putdown to label a detractor, you have to identify funny personality quirks or something easily connected to the receiver of the putdown and then find an appropriate metaphor or comparrison to bring in the jab. You want your putdown to sting a bit. Phil combined the word "tavern" with "monkey," undeniably one of God's more funny creations, with an awesome comic picture. It is obvious that it achieved its purpose.
Doug continues:
I mean, good grief, LOOK at the thing! It's juvenile WWII propaganda, a direct insult to Japanese, and it's disgusting.
(Fred) But that was the beauty of the entire picture. Don't tell me your PC, dude? What's the problem with anti-imperalist murdering thugs propaganda? You do realize how bad the Japanese army was in WW2, right?
Fred
Hip and Thigh
Hee hee hee! Monkeys.
Branson is the most Christian Conservative place in America. Branson is America once you get outside the strip. I really miss Branson and all the great folks there. Say hi to Branson for us. God Bless you my friend!
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